Funny incidents from our lives

We were traveling by train, and in the next compartment I immediately noticed a pretty blonde. Somehow the table organized itself, I went to their compartment, got acquainted, drank. It soon became clear that she agreed to everything. But it was impossible to have sex right away, and we agreed that I would come at night. It got dark, I drank a little to be brave, went into her compartment, quietly closed the door, undressed, and crawled under the covers on her lower right shelf. She immediately began to breathe excitedly, and even she was without panties, so I immediately threw her in and after five minutes silently finished. Well, without leaving her, he continued his long frictions and happily finished a couple more times, she also got a couple of orgasms, biting me several times on the shoulder and sighing softly. It was very sweet with her!

I got dressed in the corridor, where at least something was visible, and went to bed. In the morning, through a dream, I see that my blonde is standing in the door of the compartment, and so reproachfully says: “I was waiting for you, and you are a deceiver, but you promised …”, and goes down to the platform. I come to myself, restore the events in my head and in horror understand that yesterday I went into the wrong neighboring compartment! I knock there, I open – no one. And on the lower right shelf is a crumpled piece of paper, on which, in a green pen, in a quick handwriting, it is written: “Thank you, dear Man! It was the best night of my life. Maybe now I’ll finally become a mommy … “

And this is the story of my friend, when she told me after the fifth drink, we laughed so hard

I am married, we live with my parents. I must say right away that my dad never knocks when he comes to our room. Once I got sick, but the passion wanted sex. And so, when I was giving my husband a blowjob, I was taken apart by such a cough that it was horrible. And then dad comes in with the phrase: “Daughter, suck mukaltin! What are you holding in your hand? Mukaltin? “

: My college friend Zhenya and I once met at a party with two friends – Anya and Marina. They were large women, assertive. Soon he took Anya to his place. Marina and I went wrong, and I returned home alone – angry and disappointed. At one o’clock in the morning Zhenya calls, at the same time laughs like a madman, moans at times, and all this against the background of a siren howling:

  • If you are with Marina now, get off her immediately! Immediately! They are from the rowing team! When mine was under me, she grabbed my ass and, when she finished, jerked with all her might! I’m now being taken to the hospital by ambulance with a ruptured buttocks!

It’s good that Marina and I did not work out …

It was in the south. The number of sweet cherries was so bad that the owners from whom we rented a room allowed us to pick berries directly from the trees in the yard. I armed myself with a stepladder and, as soon as I tried to reach the ripe berries, I felt the decisive touch of cool fingers on my genitals. Someone threw my household into the other leg of the shorts, at the same time caressing so wonderfully! And a gentle woman’s voice said reproachfully:

  • Vasya, the children are watching!

The funny thing in this story is that I am not Vasya. It turned out that the husband of this beautiful blonde who lived next door had the same shorts and flip flops as mine. Then one evening she quietly popped in to me to apologize, but I was joking – only if you caress me again. She did not want to caress. but quickly gave me a blowjob – I was delighted.

  • Doctor! Look at the X-ray, he has a carrot in his anus.
  • It’s so big – how did he eat it?
  • And he did not eat it! (Hospital talk)

A friend was on the train. With her in the compartment was a couple who had sex at night. A friend was sleeping serenely and did not hear anything, but then the train suddenly jerked, she fell off the shelf on the floor, opened her eyes and saw in front of her nose the erect penis of a man who jumped up from fright. The friend screamed.

  • Do not be afraid, he will also fall now, – the neighbor reacted sadly. Then a friend took him in her mouth and he quickly finished. And when she again sat down in her place, she was stunned – the wife of that man quietly applauded her, thanking her – they say, if her husband had not finished now, he would have been angry like a dog all day. So they drank a glass of wine for timely help and laughed for a long time …

One girl was dating a young man. And they were great lovers of anal sex – they liked to protect themselves so much. Then somehow so abruptly they parted, and the young man went to her friend, with whom they, in turn, fell in love with oral sex. He left her even faster – he found a “packed” girl and married her.

Both of them in frustrated feelings somehow sit in my kitchen in the evening, pour out their souls, I pour them and sympathize, they suffer, shed tears, all the men are goats. I agree with him – I myself am such, I am a complete villain. Here the second is the first and says:

  • Well, all of them! Let’s be lesbians!
  • No, – answers the first, – I can not kiss the mouth, which was the member that was in my ass.

We probably laughed for half an hour. could not stop, because of her such trestle, then they drank another glass of wine and the three of us lay on my bed. It was just great – lying between the legs of one, enjoying her tight vagina, I famously finished in the ass first. And then, after a shower, I settled down between the legs of the first and, bringing her, strongly excited by our oh-ahs, to orgasm, with pleasure finished in the mouth of the second.

And now we have complete unity with my neighbors – their mouths and asses are always at my service. Only one condition is to bring the girl to orgasm! How lucky that guy dumped them!

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